So far, I feel like exercising and eating healthier has brought me closer to my kids. I really do feel more like playing with them when I’m done with my workouts, probably because Mommy has had some time to herself and is feeling more energized and happier about life. It feels good to be giving my kids healthier snacks since they are eating more of what I’m eating. They are my biggest motivators to finally be doing this, and keep me going. Here is some lunch I had in my daughter’s bowl, to remind me of why I’m trying to watch my portion sizes… 🙂
It is still challengeing too though. I enjoy food. I was raised to enjoy and celebrate each day and celebrating often includes food. But I’m trying to take the long, real change route of finding healthier ways to celebrate, and learning to stop when I’m full. It might be easy to look at me and think, she’s not THAT heavy. But trust me, that’s the attitude that got me to this place (and in my tight workout clothes you can see it…ugh) It’s kind of like that story about the boiling frogs. The story goes that if you put frogs in boiling water they will jump right out, but if you put them in water at room temperature and then turn up the heat, they will sit right in there until they boil alive. I don’t know if anyone’s ever done this, but the idea behind it is right on. So many of us have just sat in an increasing problem until it (poor health, obeseity…) is actually killing us and taking away from the quality of life we enjoy now.
In a way being gentle with myself and allowing myself to enjoy, indulge, forgive the extra weight, recognize that I’m still the same, good person inside, that looks aren’t as important as personality…well, all of that has resulted in my being a tired, less-confident, less focused on my kids parent. If anything, I’m having to work-out now and miss out sometimes on things with them because little by little I let this get out of hand and now I have to do something big! I want to be able to manage it so I can be here for them now and in 50 years!
And I’m doing it with your help, my kids’ help, and my husband’s help, even when he is at work. I have a long distance to go with my health but I can get there, one day at a time, especially with long distance help, like this week…
I set a goal to do 100 down and ups (start standing, go down to a crouching position with hands on the floor, push your legs back so you go into plank, and then bring your legs back in and stand up again. I would do 15 or 10 at a time, take a couple minute break and then keep going. By the time I had 20 left I was SOOOOO tired! I mean, panting, sighing, needing to rest between 5. I texted my husband, I have a goal of 100 reps and have 20 left, pray for me! Just knowing someone else knew what I was trying to accomplish helped me keep going. I texted him again, 15. Then, 10. He responded , I know you can do it!!! And after seeing those words, I pushed hard to finish those last 10. I did them straight through, no more breaks. I had tears in my eyes, I could barely stand, I was breathing loud and heavily but I was happy and proud of myself. I did it!
I know that when I take the easy way out I am not as proud of myself. I am left wondering what could have been. I’m so glad I pushed myself, found the strength I needed in my husband and myself to get the job done and am looking forward to attacking and conquering that work out again! Although, my legs are still sore… 🙂